Maybe if I? Nope. How about if I tried? Not going to work. Wait! I think I finally got it! That's not it either. As I sit here at my house and patiently wait for Carolyn, Anne, and Ray to show up. I struggle to come up with my ideas for my paper. I walk to the kitchen to see want snacks I can whip up real quick. I figure a quick PB&J should do the trick. Whats going on Twitter! This is a good time for me to check my mentions but then again I should be working on my paper. Suddenly I hear a knock on the door. I hopes its Carolyn How Can You Create Fiction When Reality Comes to Call (Carolyn Chute), Anne Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life (Anne Lamott), and Ray Zen in the Art of Writing (Ray Bradbury)
Finally! The gang has arrived at last!
Alex Brown: "Ten hours later! What took you guys so long?" Alex said.
Anne Lamott: "It was actually two hours and thirty-three minutes no thanks to traffic but who was counting." Anne Lamott said.
Ray Bradbury: "Well we would have been here quicker if Anne didn't want to stop everywhere to get a sovereign before we hit traffic. You forgot to mention that part now didn't you?" Ray Bradbury said.
Anne Lamott: "This is my first time in Philadelphia, I wanted to make sure I had a couple things to take back with me!" Anne Lamott said.
Carolyn Chute:"The good thing is we are here now. Alex what seems to be the issue?" Carolyn Chute said.
Alex Brown: "Like I was explaining over the phone, I just can't come up with anything to write about anymore. Its like my mind goes blank for periods of time and you know how I'm easily distracted so I end up not even coming back to it til the day before the assignment is due!" Alex Brown said.
Anne Lamott: "Well did you do what I told you to do? Did you buy the one-inch picture frame? The one-inch picture frame purpose is to help remind you of short assignments. Anne Lamott said.
Alex Brown: "Yes I did buy the one-inch picture frame its right over there. (points to the picture frame) But doesn't it have more of a significant meaning like what does it remind you of?" Alex Brown said.
Anne Lamott: "Yes. It reminds me that all I have to do is write down as much as I can see through a one inch picture frame. And that's exactly what you should be doing." Anne Lamott said.
Alex Brown: "I'm still confused !" Alex Brown said.
Anne Lamott: "Okay lets try a different approach. Have you at least jot down some ideas." Anne Lamott said.
Alex Brown: "Well not really. I just can't seem to get a perfect idea like I'm always stuck!" Alex Brown said.
Anne Lamott: "Now Alex what have I told you time after time? The first draft is the child's draft, where you let it all pour out and then let it romp all over the place, knowing that no one is going to see it and that you can shape it later. Your first draft is always going to be your shitty draft." Anne Lamott said.
Alex Brown: " Okay I think I'm starting to understand now about the writing process and ways to come up with my main idea but you still haven't solve my problem with getting easily distracted!" Alex Brown said.
Carolyn Chute: "Well I would be the best one to help you with that issue now wouldn't I?" Carolyn Chute said.
Alex Brown: "I guess you would!" Alex Brown said.
Carolyn Chute: "Just the other day I was having a hard time with finish my novel while guest, my husband, and that damn coo coo clock were distracting me. My Typewriter with page 1,994 of novel was screaming to me from another room: I WANT YOU." Carolyn Chute said.
Alex Brown: "And then what happen" Alex Brown said.
Carolyn Chute: "I finish hanging the laundry and went up to the typewriter and sit there, holding my head trying to quiet my head. You see, I can't just switch from life mode to writer mode. Usually it takes three days to get into the writer mode. Three days of quiet non-life mode, lots of coffee and no interruptions. Carolyn Chute said.
Alex Brown: "Well I don't have three days to write this paper, its due tomorrow!" Alex said.
Carolyn Chute: "Writing is like meditation or going into an ESP trance, or prayer. Like dreaming. You are tapping into your unconscious. To be fully conscious and alert, with life banging and popping and cuckooing all around, you are not going to find your way to your subconscious, which is a place of complete submission. Complete submission." Carolyn Chute said.
Alex Brown: "So what is the point that your trying to make?" Alex Brown said.
Carolyn Chute: "That you need to eliminate all distractions, especially guests, a husband, and a damn coo coo clock!" Carolyn Chute said.
Alex Brown: That's great Carolyn I really appreciate it. Ray you got any suggestions for me?" Alex Brown said.
Ray Bradbury: "Speak softly, and write any old word that wants to jump out of your nerves onto the page ." Rad Bradbury said.
Alex Brown: "Huh?!" Alex Brown said.
Rad Bradbury: Im sorry I was referring to when I was a child growing up in Waukegan Illinois and we had only one bathroom and,.... Never mind." Ray Bradbury said.
Alex Brown: " No go ahead I'm listening." Alex Brown said.
Rad Bradbury: "No its okay because I'm getting off topic. But anyways like I was saying you should learn how to blurt out your words faster because it will help you write more swiftly and help you become more honest in your writing." Ray Bradbury said.
Alex Brown:"So basically want your saying is when I have an idea I should blurt it out in words so I'm not holding anything back which will eventually reveal everything, turning my writing into my honest thoughts?" Alex Brown said.
Ray Bradbury:" My point exactly!" Ray Bradbury said.
Alex Brown: "Okay see now were getting somewhere!" Alex Brown said.
Finally! The gang has arrived at last!
Alex Brown: "Ten hours later! What took you guys so long?" Alex said.
Anne Lamott: "It was actually two hours and thirty-three minutes no thanks to traffic but who was counting." Anne Lamott said.
Ray Bradbury: "Well we would have been here quicker if Anne didn't want to stop everywhere to get a sovereign before we hit traffic. You forgot to mention that part now didn't you?" Ray Bradbury said.
Anne Lamott: "This is my first time in Philadelphia, I wanted to make sure I had a couple things to take back with me!" Anne Lamott said.
Carolyn Chute:"The good thing is we are here now. Alex what seems to be the issue?" Carolyn Chute said.
Alex Brown: "Like I was explaining over the phone, I just can't come up with anything to write about anymore. Its like my mind goes blank for periods of time and you know how I'm easily distracted so I end up not even coming back to it til the day before the assignment is due!" Alex Brown said.
Anne Lamott: "Well did you do what I told you to do? Did you buy the one-inch picture frame? The one-inch picture frame purpose is to help remind you of short assignments. Anne Lamott said.
Alex Brown: "Yes I did buy the one-inch picture frame its right over there. (points to the picture frame) But doesn't it have more of a significant meaning like what does it remind you of?" Alex Brown said.
Anne Lamott: "Yes. It reminds me that all I have to do is write down as much as I can see through a one inch picture frame. And that's exactly what you should be doing." Anne Lamott said.
Alex Brown: "I'm still confused !" Alex Brown said.
Anne Lamott: "Okay lets try a different approach. Have you at least jot down some ideas." Anne Lamott said.
Alex Brown: "Well not really. I just can't seem to get a perfect idea like I'm always stuck!" Alex Brown said.
Anne Lamott: "Now Alex what have I told you time after time? The first draft is the child's draft, where you let it all pour out and then let it romp all over the place, knowing that no one is going to see it and that you can shape it later. Your first draft is always going to be your shitty draft." Anne Lamott said.
Alex Brown: " Okay I think I'm starting to understand now about the writing process and ways to come up with my main idea but you still haven't solve my problem with getting easily distracted!" Alex Brown said.
Carolyn Chute: "Well I would be the best one to help you with that issue now wouldn't I?" Carolyn Chute said.
Alex Brown: "I guess you would!" Alex Brown said.
Carolyn Chute: "Just the other day I was having a hard time with finish my novel while guest, my husband, and that damn coo coo clock were distracting me. My Typewriter with page 1,994 of novel was screaming to me from another room: I WANT YOU." Carolyn Chute said.
Alex Brown: "And then what happen" Alex Brown said.
Carolyn Chute: "I finish hanging the laundry and went up to the typewriter and sit there, holding my head trying to quiet my head. You see, I can't just switch from life mode to writer mode. Usually it takes three days to get into the writer mode. Three days of quiet non-life mode, lots of coffee and no interruptions. Carolyn Chute said.
Alex Brown: "Well I don't have three days to write this paper, its due tomorrow!" Alex said.
Carolyn Chute: "Writing is like meditation or going into an ESP trance, or prayer. Like dreaming. You are tapping into your unconscious. To be fully conscious and alert, with life banging and popping and cuckooing all around, you are not going to find your way to your subconscious, which is a place of complete submission. Complete submission." Carolyn Chute said.
Alex Brown: "So what is the point that your trying to make?" Alex Brown said.
Carolyn Chute: "That you need to eliminate all distractions, especially guests, a husband, and a damn coo coo clock!" Carolyn Chute said.
Alex Brown: That's great Carolyn I really appreciate it. Ray you got any suggestions for me?" Alex Brown said.
Ray Bradbury: "Speak softly, and write any old word that wants to jump out of your nerves onto the page ." Rad Bradbury said.
Alex Brown: "Huh?!" Alex Brown said.
Rad Bradbury: Im sorry I was referring to when I was a child growing up in Waukegan Illinois and we had only one bathroom and,.... Never mind." Ray Bradbury said.
Alex Brown: " No go ahead I'm listening." Alex Brown said.
Rad Bradbury: "No its okay because I'm getting off topic. But anyways like I was saying you should learn how to blurt out your words faster because it will help you write more swiftly and help you become more honest in your writing." Ray Bradbury said.
Alex Brown:"So basically want your saying is when I have an idea I should blurt it out in words so I'm not holding anything back which will eventually reveal everything, turning my writing into my honest thoughts?" Alex Brown said.
Ray Bradbury:" My point exactly!" Ray Bradbury said.
Alex Brown: "Okay see now were getting somewhere!" Alex Brown said.